Preparing For a Second Baby

Preparing For a Second Baby

When we first found out we were pregnant with baby number 2 a little bit of shock set in. My partner and I had discussed potentially having another child at some point down the line in the distant future but hadn’t anticipated it happening the very next month. Hey, accidents happen. As elated as we are now that I’m 12 weeks pregnant for the arrival of the newest addition to the family to arrive, it took a few days for us to come to our senses.

The initial rush of emotions had a lot to do with us considering how much time it was going to require from us to care for our now 2 year old daughter and a newborn simultaneously. My career was just picking back up again since coming off maternity a year prior and my partner’s schedule is so jam packed with travel dates and work trips that its hard to imagine him being able to slow down to help much with all there will be to do. Its no wonder we were a bit frazzled at first. Like, “are we nuts?!" Surely, a screw had come loose somewhere along the way and in our deranged slumber we made a left when we should’ve gone straight.

The most reassuring news came from my mother. She offered to come stay on and off for the first few months of the babies arrival. She is not retired, however, just had foot surgery that could potentially send here into early retirement. Not the best for mom, but happy she is willing to help however she can. We are also excited to not be having another child in the mild of a pandemic! When Ché was born the world was completely shut down. We were very isolated. No one came in or out of the house except my mother for the entire duration of my pregnancy and then several months after her arrival. When I tell you how hard that was for me, a rather social butterfly, I really mean it. This time around, however, we will be tapping all the aunties and uncles who have offered their support to come over an actually help.

Help with newborns can be a hard card to drawl for some people. This is because everyone doesn’t not want their babies being touched by everyone. Instead of holding baby friends can help with laundry, do the dishes, cook some food, send takeout, take the baby for a walk in stroller while mom gets a nap in. Friends can run to the grocery store or target for bits here and there. Friends can do all sorts of stuff to help that will surprise you. So, my recommendation will be to lean into your tribe as much as possible. And just know the toughest part will be the first 6 months. Make a plan. Have a daily schedule and stick to it. A routine will help you tremendously maintain your sanity. Eventually time will pass and your two kids will be playing together and life will get easier.

It is important that you make a pact with your partner to share responsibilities, even if you aren’t together. There will be a lot to do, you can’t do it all on your own, mom! If you can afford it, hire help. Even if you can only afford to have a professional once a week for a few hours, take it! I’m taking a baby nurse. Baby nurses are licensed, certified individuals who come into your home and take the baby for however long you need them to. If you know you only have $100 to spare a week let someone come in and handle everything for you so you can get some rest, clear your mind, go meditate, do whatever you do to find stillness.